Have you ever felt lost?  Alone and confused?  Not knowing what your next step should be?  We all have those moments of despair - even me.

In the moments of my deepest longing and despair, I am not shy about asking for miracles and more importantly expecting to receive them.  Miracles may seem like a lofty request, but they're not.  They happen when we get out of our heads and into a space of awareness to receive them.

My miracles aren't burning bushes or the parting of deep seas.  My miracles are subtle signs, messages, chance encounters, an intuitive thought, or a change in perception that allows me to reframe my perspective.

I've been asking for miracles lately. Today they appeared.

The first miracle was a message in one of the meditation books I read each morning:  "We can believe that nothing is impossible in human relationships, if we depend on the help of [the Universe]." 

The second miracle was in the Buckeye Honda women's restroom.  I washed my hands and turned around to open the door.  There on the back of the door was a coat hook in the shape of a dragonfly.  Yes, a dragonfly!  Those who know me well and who have known me long also know that dragonflies are big magic in my life.  Every time they appear in any form, the energy will shift around me and change will take place. 

The weekend before I went out with my husband for the first time, I sat down at a table where very single one of the women sitting there had a dragonfly motif somewhere on her clothing, purse, jacket . . .  I silently said to the Universe, "Bring it."

Today I stared at the dragonfly hook on the back of the restroom door and said, "Okay."

What signs have you received lately?  Have you asked for miracles? 


Photo by Kretyen on Flickr.com

Before there was the hit movie, The Secret; before the Law of Attraction, before Anthony Robbins; yes, even before there was Oprah - there was Emmet Fox (1886-1951)!

Did you really think Anthony Robbins came up with the Seven Day Mental Diet or that the Law of Attraction was new?  Rhonda Byrnes said it right in The Secret: these universal laws have been taught down through the ages.  She had it wrong when she said it was a secret.  There is no secret!  Most of the great spiritual teachings down through the ages have talked about it.  The only problem is that the message kept being warped by the manipulation of humanity until it was almost unrecognizable.  The other problem is that even though the message is there for all of us, all of the time - we only can hear it when we're ready.  Are you ready now to change your life by changing your mind?


Emmet Fox talked about the Seven Day Mental Diet before most of us (yes, me included) were born!  For the next seven days, the free Cosmic Postcard sent out by Enigma Wellness is going to go through the Seven Day Mental Diet as first presented by Emmet Fox with new thoughts and practices from Enigma Wellness.

Again, are you ready now?  If so, sign up for the Cosmic Postcard in the upper right side-bar of this page and starting tomorrow, you'll receive a daily email with the Seven Day Mental Diet

Have you ever felt despair over conflict in a relationship?  Fear of the unknown?  Regret over the past?

The best life coaching I ever received when I felt despair was to "ask for wisdom and a new opportunity to be of service."  That is my request most days.  Yesterday the answer was to spill an entire 12 oz. travel mug of warm tea on myself while I was driving!

I was driving a girlfriend to a cemetery about an hour and a half south of my hometown.  It was a healing journey for my friend to mourn the life of a family member who had died shortly after birth.  The car was heavy with emotion.

Our directions were for the cemetery office, not the cemetery itself.  As I turned the car around for the second time after searching down the wrong street, I reached for my travel mug in the cup holder by the driver's seat.  When I lifted the cup, the top came off.  The entire contents dumped into my lap!  After my initial startled reaction, I thought, "Huh, I wonder why that happened?"

My girlfriend was horrified as I sat there soaked to the skin.  Her inward focus turned on me as she started fussing.  "We have to find you some dry pants before we go to the grave site," she insisted.

The lukewarm tea was quickly turning into ice cold blue jeans so I agreed.  I turned the car around yet another time and headed toward a strip mall that I noticed as we entered the city.  At the strip mall, we cruised through the parking lot looking for a clothing store.  The only option was a thrift store. 

Thrift stores have a huge selection of jeans grouped by color. My mission was to find a pair that was relatively close to a 4 petite, which is a hard size to find.  After trying on three different pairs of jeans, I found a pair that fit me perfectly. 

My friend met me at the check-out counter.  She had a small wooden rocking horse, a tricycle sculpture, and a candle.  Little did I know how important those items were to her.

When we settled back into the car, my friend turned to me and said, "Months ago after I found this grave site, I began dreaming about placing a rocking horse and tricycle on this baby's grave.  It totally slipped my mind.  I didn't think about it until I saw the rocking horse in the thrift store.  It's the same rocking horse that was in my dream.  If you hadn't spilled that tea in our lap, we wouldn't be here."

I smiled at her and hugged her across the console.

If you're feeling negativity this holiday season, one of the quickest methods out of it is to "ask for wisdom and a new opportunity to serve."  Have you helped someone today?

Mary is recovering from breaking-up with her boyfriend of two years.  After they moved in together, Mary discovered he had a drinking problem.  After enduring his verbal attacks and bad behavior for over a year.  Mary had enough.  She moved him out of her house.

Mary assures me that she's not looking for a date and not looking for a man.  I reassured her that sooner or later she would get lonely or her hormones would kick in and all her resolve about staying away from men would disappear.  Here is the first bit of advice that I give single women about dating, "The guy has to have a job and a clue."  You might find a lot of men with a job but very few of them have a clue."  If I have to explain what a "clue" is then you're not a woman.

Where would you go to find a man?  

The way I explained it to Mary is this.  If you're looking for a thoroughbred horse, don't go a pig sty because all you'll find are pigs.  There are lots of other places to meet someone besides a bar.  Joining clubs, taking classes, and networking are all ways to be around like minded people.

Another thing that happens with women is that they settle for what they can get rather than waiting for what they want.  Most of us don't even know what we want.  The only thing we're sure of is that we want to be wanted.  And, we're always sure of what we don't want after we get it.  Write it down on paper.

On my first list, I wrote:

Must be kind, on a spiritual path, like good food, bad movies, classical movies and me.  Athletic.  Non-violent.  Tall with dark hair.

The next man in my life had all those qualities.  He died in his early forties.  I added to my list - must be healthy and strong.

Are you settling for what you can get?  Are you looking for love in all the wrong places?
 
Pig photo by BlueKDesign on Flickr.com.

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It usually takes about 30 days to change a habit. Not because you need 30 days. You could do it in 68 seconds if you could once you did it hold your vibration there, but you have to consciously make that decision.

--- Abraham

Excerpted from the workshop in Napa, CA on Sunday, March 2nd, 1997 #278

This morning I read an article on The Huffington Post,  When Women Hate Their Bodies, Men Suffer Too, by Susan Harrow, author of How to Sell Yourself Without Selling Your Soul, that prompted this post.  Susan told the story of Tawnya who even after 30 years of marriage suffered from such a poor body image that she became unreasonably jealous every time her husband looked a another woman.  She had breast implants even though her husband loved her body the way it was.

In my experience as a life coach and massage therapist, I've learned that the reality of a woman's physical appearance is never as strong as a negative mental image. Like the article says, a woman's body image is constructed from past experiences and self-talk.  In my experience it also comes from comparisons with an ideal set long ago by Barbie or beauty magazines.

Years ago a woman came to me for bodywork.  She had a beautiful body by anyone's standards.  During the session, she opened up and confessed how ashamed she was of her body.  She was so ashamed that she never let her husband see her naked.  It didn't matter how she looked in the mirror because in her mind all she saw was ugliness.  Her husband could not compliment her enough to heal that insecurity.

When I was about nine years old, my brother-in-law told me I was built like a linebacker.  I grew up in the rural mid-west playing with Barbie dolls.  Marcia Brady was the girl to be. My body image was horrible!  I was Asian.  My hair color was wrong.  My eye color was wrong.  My breasts were too small and my legs were too short!

In my late teens I used to fast to try to lose weight for my ballet instructor.  Cheryl Tiegs was the hot model of the day.  It was before Asians were in beauty magazines or the media.  The only thing that saved me from an eating disorder was my love of food and becoming a gourmet cook.  Even so I hated my body.

Every time someone called me "tiny" or "petite", the image of a linebacker would pop into my mind, the negative image planted by a teasing comment in my childhood. I would not accept and love my body until I was in my early forties. 

The first step to overcome my negative body image was awareness.  I became aware that it was there and where it came from.  I began talking about it and listening to how others recovered from the same problem.  Slowly, I began turning my perspective on my body.

What finally saved me was soccer. 

At forty years old, I began playing in an adult recreational soccer league.  After only a year or so of playing, a man approached me after a game.  He actually invited me to play on a team with him.  As I drove away from that game, I was thrilled and grateful just to be wanted!  In the middle of that state of gratitude, it came to me that my body was perfect for soccer - small breasts, strong legs perfect for sprinting, and a low center of gravity.

Oh, and I stopped reading beauty magazines.

How does your mental image effect your body image?  Does it effect your relationship with your spouse or boyfriend?  Do you have a story about how you changed your perception?

Photo by MCSimon on Flickr.com.

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