According to the Law of Attraction, the vibrational energy of our core beliefs attracts all relationships and experiences to us.   That vibrational energy is transmitted to the world around us not only through the actions we take but also through our thoughts and feelings.  We literally create our lives through unseen means.  One might ask, if we get to create our lives in the way we want, why would we attract relationships that cause us pain?

We attract relationships that cause us pain because we need to affirm our core beliefs about ourselves and we attract the relationships we need to help us grow. Therefore, a victim must attract a persecutor.  A caretaker must have someone who needs care.  A perfectionist must attract someone who is critical and judgmental.  An insecure person must attract someone who can’t love her, and a person with low self-esteem must attract someone who tells her she’s not good enough.

Repeating patterns in relationships that cause painful emotions are signals to prompt us to look for changes that need to be made within.  Just when we thought we were done with an uncomfortable relationship pattern, it can repeat itself with another person to teach us another lesson and to allow us to heal at a deeper level.

Many times these relationship patterns repeat themselves because we have not completed the learning experience.  We leave the relationship before the lesson is learned.  Whatever we do not heal in one relationship, we carry on to the next one.  We leave with re-opened wounds, old scars, and all our defenses intact.  Those wounds, scars, and defenses are the emotional matrix within which all our relationships develop.  We carry this emotional matrix with us at an unconscious, core level wherever we go.

Awareness is the first key to change. How can we become aware of our emotional matrix? Can we change our core thoughts and feelings to create better relationships?

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No one comes into our lives by accident.  Carolyn Myss, Sacred Contracts

Photo courtesy of Tanakawho from Flickr.com.